As I discussed in my most recent journal entry, I have been called to embrace the divine feminine. Yet, when I was first called to this path, I admit that I had no idea what that meant!
After a month of contemplation and work on my sacred femininity, I am here to share what I have learned in the hopes that it can help someone else embracing their feminine nature, whether you are male, female, non-binary, agender, cis or trans. According to many theories, these energies we designate as “male” and “female,” are present in everyone. If you were to remove those labels, you are left simply with traits all people may try to balance to find inner harmony. For the purpose of discussing these traits, I will use Feminine and Masculine as terms not to define one as gendered, but simply to discuss them from a framework of their existent dichotomy.
I wholly intend to come back and address the Sacred Masculine, but we will start here since I am more familiar with it at this time.
In today’s world, the concept of femininity is largely muddied by an overwhelmingly patriarchal and contradictory society. Women are expected to look a certain way that is neither too thin nor too fat with just the right amount of “curves” (but not curves with cellulite or stretch marks). Women are expected to dress conservatively and yet provocatively. Women are expected to be homemakers, housewives, and mothers, yet to work full time jobs at the same time. Wear makeup, but not too much. Don’t be “selfish” and self care too much.
In addition to all of the issues faced by those who identify as women, for those who identify as men, having any attachment to a “feminine” side or even singular “feminine” traits is often attacked and ridiculed. Men are not “allowed” by society to be in tune with the sacred feminine that all people can contain.
The list of forced ideas goes on and on. Society has left those who identify as women or are trying to work with feminine energy a very difficult task. In the same way, men are cornered as well. Indeed, even those who identify as some form of non-binary likely find themselves trapped in the world’s view of femininity. How can one be feminine when there are so many double standards and Catch 22s?
The key, as with many things, lies within.
What is Feminine?
There are many things that are characterized as feminine. When I list these words, don’t think in terms of positive or negative as all things in the world can go either way. Think only about how they can contribute to one’s life, or how they play a role in your own life:
Femininity as a divine force, the complimentary force of the masculine, is often seen as more emotional, intuitive, and giving. There is nothing right or wrong, better or worse, about qualities that are often designated as feminine.
Suggestions on Embracing Your Divine Feminine
In my quest of self discovery, I discovered many concepts of what embracing the Divine Feminine looked like. Here is my gleaned wisdom from this process.
Ask yourself the following questions:
- What does femininity mean to me?
- Is there anything about traditional female traits or activities, are there any that I actually enjoy?
- What holds me back from who I really am?
- Is there something I need to release that disallows my own unique feminine-energy/part from shining through me?
Consider the following practices:
- CREATE! Write, do art, dance. Just create something from within your soul.
- EXPLORE your sensuality. This might be making your environment beautiful, wearing colors you love, making a special space, redecorating, or anything you consider sensuous.
- COLLABORATE and meet with women whether you are a woman or not. Talk about and seek other ideas of femininity.
- CULTIVATE openness, love, compassion, and gentleness towards the world and yourself. Chose to do things that build these qualities and attitudes within yourself.
- MEDITATE on femininity.
- EXAMINE your external perceptions of womanhood. Figure out what fits with YOU.
- HEAL your ideas towards motherhood and mothers, whether that be your own sense or view of motherhood or your own sense or view of your mother/another mother-figure. Set yourself free from the negative holdings.
- GET IN TUNE with your intuition. Listen to your emotions.
- EMBRACE your own body. It is beautiful just as it is. It does not need to change. It can if you want it to for the right reasons for you.
- QUESTION your resistance to feminine energy on a spiritual, mental, physical, and societal level. Even if you are NOT female, consider why you might resist feminine parts of yourself. RELEASE those resistances and let those things exist as they want to.
- LOVE your lovely self.
- ABOVE ALL ELSE, consider what femininity means and looks like TO YOU!
I’d love to hear from you how you are embracing the feminine sides of yourself!